Yay, Elf on the Shelf has appeared in our home in Cyprus! And we are having some fun with him. Though we seem to have ended up with a disgusting one. You have been warned . . .

We are staying in Cyprus for Christmas this year and, because we will be missing our usual Christmas traditions with friends and family, we decided to start a new one.

This involved purchasing an over-priced felt elf in a glossy box and taking it to the tailor to have metal wire inserted in his arms and legs to make him maneuverable. There are loads of tutorials on YouTube to show you how to do this yourself if you can be bothered.

The rules are: No touching. If Goobie touches the elf, he will disappear. There’s a more elaborate backstory involving the elf acting as a spy for Santa to get children to behave, but rewards/punishments aren’t really our thing (this article explains why). So we’ve ditched what we don’t like from Elf on the Shelf and kept what we do like – which are the cheeky pranks.

Day One

Easy. Goobie names the elf Freddie and tells us categorically that he’s a toy. Then gets upset with his friend for breaking the no-touching rule and making Freddie ‘disappear.’

Day Two

A really quick one to do. As long as you haven’t got cats.

Day Three

Not so quick to do. Or undo. Goobie thought it was hilarious. He’s really into this now.

Day Four

Goobie’s absolute favourite. Honestly, it’s watered-down Nutella. I fear we’ve peaked too soon.

Day Five

Looking for Freddie’s newest prank is the only thing getting Goobie out of bed quickly. I think he now believes that Freddie is real when he turns his back (à la Toy Story). But perhaps he’s humouring us . . .

Day Six

Every single one of those 80 sweets I unwrapped went in the bin. Except for two. They went in my mouth. Goobie thought Freddie had stolen his Halloween sweets. I reminded him that, after his pig-fest under the sofa that time, most of his Halloween sweets have already been eaten. By him. Not me.

Day Seven

The inevitable puke-fest after the pig-fest the day before. Goobie loved this. It’s just his leftover dinner thrown in the blender with some milk. A little too realistic for Matt.

On to Week Two. Thank god for Pinterest.

Though the Puke©2016 and the PooInLoo©2016 were my Original Ideas.